Ode To ColdFusion On Valentine's Day
Today, on Valentine's Day, I wanted to take a moment and share my love for the ColdFusion programming language.
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As a man, I'm quite aware
Of just how rude it is to stare,
But with your tags and angled brackets —
Your robust code and taunting tactics —
I find that I cannot control
The thoughts of you that haunt my soul.
And as the days lead into night
I keep you fixed within my sight,
Not even sleep can sate this hunger
Where byte-code falls like dreamy thunder.
At first I thought it was my choice,
ColdFusion - my heuristic voice,
But over time, I've been demeaned
To bow before my zoftig Queen.
And now I slave to fill her buffer
In hopes to show just how I love her,
With many lines of homage paid,
So I can say, "ColdFusion-made!"
I do all this to make her proud -
To raise her up above the crowd
And build for her an awesome shrine,
My love, my Queen — My Valentine.
I hope you all have a wonderful, love-filled Valentine's Day!
Reader Comments
Thts really gay!
@Roberto,
If by Gay, you mean awesome - then yes, I agree.
Awesome. Well done.
Roberto's comment needs to be deleted though.
No, I didnt mean it! Just say its Terrible!
@Jason, How can you be agree? kkk
Ohh, Ben, Ben, Ben, you big valentine plush toy. You finally lost your marbles, eh?
Awesome song.
@Tim,
I find the crazier I get, the more interesting life becomes :)
I love it!
You're definitively crazy :-)
Ben, Can I quote that: I find the crazier I get, the more interesting life becomes"
You should coin it.
@Dani,
Thanks - it was fun to write; never written a poem about a programming language before.
@Aurélien,
I'd be hard-pressed to argue with that :)
@Dani,
Ha ha, go for it :)
I have to find an old poem a friend wrote about his love for the "T-bone"
Ha, awesome. Good one for a first try.... too bad I would have to change so many words for it to work as a Valentines poem for my wife...
Thanks Ben!
Nice, who knew that Ben was also poet!!
@Dani,
You can't go wrong with a good steak!
@Rob,
I'll help you out next year ;)
@Jalpino,
That's how I filled my Humanities requirements in college - Creative Writing Fiction and Creative Writing Poetry.
This is well-timed and EPIC. :)
Almost fell out my chair laughing!
faves: "Where byte-code falls like dreamy thunder", and "But over time, I've been demeaned... To bow before my zoftig Queen."
I'll never look at CF the same way again! Love it man!
OMG! Ben you're a freak! ;-)
AWESOME!!!!!! I loved it!
@Aaron,
Heck, I was just happy to use the word zoftig for the first time; I've heard it before, but never put it into action. I just love the way it sounds.
@Marcos,
Ha ha, glad you enjoyed.
If only Coldfusion returned the affection. She is a cold, merciless mistress... but still we cannot help ourselves.
@Ben, ha! Yeah, I had to look up zoftig :D
@manchicken: she's cold but delivers...now I'm confused...am I talking about ColdFusion or my wife...oops
Does it matter? (honey, if you're reading I'm just joking.)
Absolutely love this Ben!
@Dani, @Themanchicken,
Ha ha, you guys are too much :)
@Ryan,
Thanks my man - thought I'd have some fun with the day.
@themanchicken you are joking, please talk for yourself. :) (I know my honey won't read this)
hahahahaha
Wow.
Now all you need to do is take up Parkour and you will be my new god.. ;)
You nut job. Love it.
ColdFusion coder, body builder, and with the soul of a poet no less. Mr. Nadel, you are a true Renaissance Man. :-)
@James,
Ha ha ha, I got the sweatpants - now, I just need the class.
@James FE,
Thank you kind sir :)
I was thinking about changing the "ColdFusion" with my girlfriend's name but I think she is not going to like the "But with your tags and angled brackets" part
@Jean,
Ha ha, yeah, you'll lose a little something in translation there ;)
Much more creative than <cf_valentine />
awesomesauce :)
jQuery, very quite contrary,
if you had boobies, I would marry.
@Jason,
I'm so happy to see someone else use "awesome sauce". I use that a lot in the real world, but wasn't sure if that was a "thing" people said! Hello validation!
@WebManWalking,
He he he... boobies.
I'm proud to say we share the same first name and love of ColdFusion. Great poem, got my first belly laugh in days.
@Ben,
My take on 'awesomesauce' is that's it's probably already passe, but I just can't stop using it ... at least not for stuff like this poem ;)
@Ben,
Heck yeah - "Ben" for the win !
@Jason,
Sometimes, the good phrases just keep coming back around. Hella sweeeet :)
awwww!!! ha ha!! Ben....you are full of surprises!! this was so creative.
I am sure that love is mutual :D
ah...and the quote:
["I find the crazier I get, the more interesting life becomes"]-- :D So true. I tried that in my life too and it works :D.
LOL! That's awesome Ben!
haha Ben, always thinking! Very creative :)
Long live the Queen.
@Iveth,
Thanks - I like to let it all hang out from time to time.
@Jason, @Aaron,
Thanks fellas.
Ben, this sounded like open mic night at a sleazy bar at the far end of town. Good on ya. Oh, while this one was ok, last years Valentine's post was much better. ;-)
@Aaron,
Ha ha, maybe I'll switch back and forth from year to year... just wait till next February ;)
Maybe this is part of a future coldfusion dating and romance site :)
To find other coldfusion programmers to date and match up against lol
@Craig,
Ha ha ... hot!
@Ben, you had me at byte-code. <quivering>You had me at byte-code.</quivering>
(LOL'ing at the poem. Way too much effort put in to it).
Ben, it's okay to love Coldfusion. Just don't love ColdFusion.
@Randall,
The heart wants what the heart wants :D
I even have an idea for the domain name...
HotFusionMatches.com - The El33t Dating Site for ColdFusion Professionals, who want it HoT at home :)
@Craig,
Ha ha, sounds steamy :)
[and I quote] "But with your tags and angled brackets -"
...and I screamed "hypocrisy" !!!
I thought people hated those brackets and tags. That's why even cfquery has an equivalent C/Java style syntax (which is stupid IMHO)
I love the poem! It's simply lovely, creative and sweet, just like it's author.
@Aphtk,
What can I say - I'm a fan of the tags. I use so much of the templating aspect of ColdFusion that the tags just seem to be the most seamlessly integratable version of the language.
Perhaps if ColdFusion ever has support for E4X within script, I'll start moving in the script direction.
@Jasmine,
Thank you :)
zoftig? I thought it was zaftig? syntax is always an issue for me, though ...
stay crazy, love it
@Levan,
Both versions of the spelling seem to show up in dictionaries; so, I wasn't sure which one to pick. I figured it didn't matter so much since the word is so cool :)